Robin Williams' death: Why Facebook updates on depression won't help

As one terrifying detail after another about Robin Williams' death was revealed - that he slit his wrists before hanging himself, that he was so desperate to die that he had made at least another two attempts on his own life before he finally succeeded - a certain alarm seemed to echo across social media.While celebrity deaths routinely throw social media addicts into a RIP-ing frenzy, this time it was different. The virtual world was mourning Williams, yes, but it seemed that the actor's death had made depression a reality that could not be denied anymore. At least for the few days to come.Several status updates on Facebook emphasised the need to 'reach out' to friends and acquaintances, who could possibly be suffering from depression. Try to figure what's going on behind that smile. Are you sure the really funny friend is actually not manic depressive? Is that friend, who is the life of every party, actually afraid of being lonely? It's as if five out of ten status updates on your timeline were from people who were all ready to rescue anyone who they thought could be suffering from depression.The sympathy flowing all around social media should have ideally come as reassurance for Sashwat (name changed on request). After all, people were finally talking about psychological issues that several people like him face. Sashwat has anxiety disorder and his therapist told him that he is just among the millions battling the disorder in India."How come I have never come across any of them?" he asked, vexed."Did you talk to anyone before this?" his doctor asked."Nope," Sashwat answered, in a moment realising that he had answered his own question.[caption id="attachment_1662651" align="alignleft" width="380"] Robin Williams. Reuters.[/caption]So, finally when people were talking about a psychological disorder, if not specifically an anxiety disorder, with so much interest and declaring they were ready to 'help', ideally Sashwat should have felt happy. However, he wasn't affected at all. In fact, he was wary."In essence, the 'reach-out-to-people-you-know' thing that Williams' death has sparked on social media is slightly daunting. It's not the concern that worries me, it's what the concern is tied to or emanates from that leaves me perturbed," Sashwat says.Basically, the fact that concern about psychological disorders seems to have gained life from a scary suicide of a big celebrity, makes it even more difficult for people struggling with various psychological disorders to talk about it. Mostly because you never know if the other person, given the timing, considers you to be suicidal too.There are various kinds of psychological disorders, each making several fairly simple things in life difficult for its victims. Each needs to be talked about and most importantly, understood fully. And the best way to understand them is not to make them seem like one single ailment, severe manifestations of which can lead to suicide.There are several kinds of pyschological disorders and can be broadly divided into nine categories, each with its own sub-categories.It is probably fair to argue that the concern pouring in over psychological disorders is slightly badly timed. Because all of it is tied to a gruesome suicide. And unlike Williams, who spoke at length about his struggle with depression, very few people want to raise suspicions in his/her acquaintances' mind that he/she might be suicidal. For all you know, the person in question might just be upset and the social media conversation around Williams' death triggers a misplaced and disturbing sense of alarm about his/her mental condition.In a moving article called 'I wish depression could be my Facebook status' author Terezia Farkas, a bestselling author and a victim of depression herself, talks about dealing with psychological disorders in the age of social media. She begins with the following lines: "Facebook is a great social media tool for personal sharing and life updates. However, when you're depressed or suicidal there is no app to share a sad face that means "Today I want to die" or "I'm so depressed I don't know what to do about it."And in the first paragraph itself, she probably explains why the social media anxiety and overwhelming concern for depression can be at best ineffective, or even unsettling.She says, "I know from firsthand experience depression isn't something you just put up on Facebook as a status update. Depression is a personal torment uniquely designed for maximum effect by you, the sufferer. Part of that torment is the inability, the refusal, the denial to talk openly about depression."She further adds, "I have had friends commit suicide, and except for the few friends and family who were personally involved in their lives, no one on Facebook realized the depth of their pain." Despite literally tying our lives to Facebook and Twitter, we all probably know well that a Facebook 'like' or a Facebook comment means little in real life and often the activities don't stem from a deep, serious interest in each others lives. Hence, we keep the biggest disappointments to ourselves. These don't find a mention on Facebook.Similarly, the show of concern, when it happens, is most likely to be read as a fad, a passing, whimsical interest shown by people who are least likely to engage with the issue deeply. What happens a month after the shock around Robin Williams' death has blown over? Will we be still talking about depression or other psychological disorders? Obviously, no.Priyanka (named changed on request) was gently told by a doctor she was visiting with a throat ailment, that she suffers from a panic disorder. "I had imagined the worst happening to me. Like a logical person I Googled symptoms of my throat problem and decided I might be suffering from some incurable throat ailment. I was shocked when the doctor said I had a minor cough which didn't even require medication. But my anxiety disorder did," she says. Priyanka was on medication for two months and gradually learnt to get a grip on panic.Priyanka later talked about it to several of her friends - over dinner, coffee, night out drinking etc. Would she have come out and spoken about it now on say Facebook? "Definitely not. Because the responses to Williams' death are indiscriminate. I understand everyone is in shock and psychological disorders can be fatal, the one I had suffered from wasn't this. I am just wary of trying explain that when the whole world seems to be equating psychological disorders with death," she says.A lot of the responses on Facebook, some even suggesting that instead of killing himself, Williams should have rather spoken about it (he did, extensively) shows that while there is some amount of sympathy, there is very little understanding about such issues. Such responses in fact are as problematic as a sufferer not dealing with a psychological issue the right way.Social media, as a medium is also perceived as something that can potentially trigger depression. A study identified a problem young adults suffer from as 'Facebook depression' where the number of friends, likes, comments etc have a potential to make someone feel unhappy. Understandably, given the popular perception around the medium, it is slightly challenging to turn it into a medium to spread awareness.For example, even after Williams' death, very few people went and joined the several pages on Facebook that talk about depression and other difficulties as such. In all possibilities, while you might have spotted a dozen statuses on depression, you haven't got a single notification about a friend liking a page like this. That goes a long way in explaining the challenges that lie in turning social media into a weapon to fight psychological disorders.